Thursday, March 31, 2011

On Rights And Liberty

Okay, I WAS going to write a wonderful little post on human rights, busybodies, and so forth, but decided that would be a boring topic to write on for the return of my blogging. So instead, I'm writing a post praising various Tea Party/Conservafundie figures for the following reasons:

1) To see how many search results can be gotten.
2) In the spirit of the general trollery which will befall the world tomorrow.
3) I'm still thinking of this reason. I'll get back to it later.

I'll release it tomorrow, so consider this a heads up. (Sorry, no real April Foolery going on here. Still thinking of something to do in real life.)

Just as a plan for the next few weeks, I'll be doing more fiction, possibly some world news type things, and probably some humorous (or what I like to imagine as humorous) essays. I'm itching to do the tvtropes thing again. The rest of this post is dedicated to speculation as to what various websites will do tomorrow (or today, for all you folks not in the Americas).

New York Times: Publish a fake report on world news.

The Onion: Publish a real report on world news.

Fox News: Publish a real report on world news.

CNN: Publish something newsworthy.

(Okay, so the NYT one was just a setup for these three)

Google: I have no idea on this one. Something worth many laughs.

Bing: The exact same thing as above.

Youtube: Every video is a Rick Roll.

Wikipedia: Rearrange its articles so that they are alphabetized, but words are still the same length. (Okay, probably not, but I'll be doing that.)

Aaaand I'm out of ideas. New post tomorrow!

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

More Entries

That is all. Perhaps I should post some pro-Obama stuff as well?

Also, first user from Bing! I'd expect more to get here given that, oh, I don't know, they copy Google's results.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Politically Incorrect Pokemon

Today, Pokemon Racism Still Exists Pokemon Black and Pokemon White came out. It has all the spiffy bits of each new generation of Pokemon games - new beasties to catch, a new land (not based off Japan this time!) and new baddies to fight. It's got all the shininess of Red Gyarados, and quite a few new features as well, as detailed here. I'll also go into them below, to spare all you readers from having to make that huge exertion to click that link.

Triple Battles
This is the first major change. Yes. You can send three Pokemon into battle at a time now.


Okay, first, why couldn't we do this earlier? I mean, was it against intergalactic Pokemon law to throw more than two Pokemon out? Perhaps the laws in Unova are more lenient about these things.

Second, can anyone else see where this is going? I can.


I also never really understood what stopped baddies from throwing out all their Pokemon into battle. I mean, you've already broken a few laws by TRYING TO STEAL MY POKEMON.

Let's move on to the baddies.

Team Plasma
Team Plasma is the latest set of baddies. They want to separate Pokemon and humans.

Okay, first off. Plasma. Are you serious? Plasma? This is coming from the game where the baddies haven't figured out biological warfare or even chloroform for heaven's sake! How do they know what plasma is?

Second, does their goal sound familiar to you? Separating Pokemon and humans? Maybe this wasn't the best goal, especially in conjunction with the whole Black/White motif. Fighting for segregation...

But, just a thought. What if they're the good guys? Intent on saving the Pokemon from their enslaved states? Sure, they may seem to be content, but they'd be more content on their own, no? Who knows? We certainly won't know until Pokemon can say something other than "Pika-pika-pika-chu!" (Yes, I know, Meowth and Mewtwo exist. Stop poking holes in my arguments.)

Infinite TMs
Okay, this is the last groundbreaking thing. I'm not sure you understand how groundbreaking it is. I can now satisfy my life-long dream of having a team of all HYPER BEAM!!!111!1one!1one1!1!!eleven!!!