Monday, January 10, 2011

The Future Comes

At the MPAA...

Guys, guys, I figured out a brand new way to get rid of pirates!

Um, what?

We shoot lasers at their eyes and blind them!

What? Isn't that illegal?

Well, don't worry, it's only a warning shot.

We blind them. As a warning shot. Are you kidding me?

No, look, I'm serious. Besides, it's only temporary.

Well, maybe.

Yeah, and they won't ever be able to watch a pirated movie again!

I thought you said it was temporary.

That's the great thing, we can blast them again and again because it's only temporary.

But you just-


Never mind. Okay, so how the hell are we supposed to blast them?

Long range. We get a sniper person, and shoot them. With a laser.

Wrong pirates.


We're the RIAA, not whatever group gets rid of maritime pirates.

What do maritime pirates have to do with any of this?

You're fired.

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