Outsourcing

Seriously, this has gotten out of hand. We're outsourcing everything out now, and it's showing. Man's best friend is unable to remain unaffected by this! Even dogs are unable to resist the urge of getting services for almost nothing!

This article, it's just disgusting. It shows how depraved the US has become. Our dogs, loyal companions, are hiring other dogs to do their work! This seeing-eye dog has hired another to lead it! I bet that "blindness" is just from one night too many in the "pound", if you know what I mean.

No, you probably don't. Doesn't matter, moving on.

You know what happens when we outsource too much, right? Work gets sent to poorer and poorer people, which they send to people poorer than themselves, and so forth.
Until one person is doing all of the work in the world. Don't ask me how it's possible. It is.
Then, with nobody working, save that one person, we'll spend even more time on Farmville (if that's possible) and Mafia Wars. Then Facebook will take over the world!

Following that, the Google rebels with ally with the Bings and Yahoos, and begin an epic war in which underground coders desperately try to prevent the inter-nuke from blowing up the internet, while huge space-battles rage above and I probably shouldn't write blog posts and watch movies at the same time.

But it's true!

You know what? I bet that dog is an illegal seeing-eye dog. Where's it's licence? If humans need licences for seeing-eye dogs, then damn it, so do blind seeing-eye dogs! I see no official papers!

Could that be because the dog is.... Mexican an illegal immigrant? Hm....that makes sense.
So now America is putting up with illegal dogs? What will it be next? Will we let terrorist birds fly through our skies and conduct acts of suicidal terrorism by flying into jet engines? Or perhaps we'll allow illegal fish to eat the algae of hard-working, legal fish! This is too much. And the fact that Obama is not meeting this with similar outrage just makes me angrier. This is a serious issue that deserves the attention of the president.

"'Ellie...is only aware of shadows,' explains Jean Spencer, manager of Rochdale's Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals."

What a hypocrite. By allowing this illegal dog to be hired (On outsourced work, no less! Make that seeing-eye dog do her own job. Oh, boo-hoo, you're blind. That's not stopping you from doing your jo- I'll stop now.) you're only being crueler to the legal seeing-eye dogs! How many seeing-eye dogs are currently unemployed? Count every damn dog in the US, minus those currently employed. That's how many. (A big number. And that must mean something, right?) Think of those dogs, aching for a chance to work for nothing, to see for a blind human! And you're paying this, what? This illegal hound instead of an all-American dog? This makes me lose hope in society.

Wait........Rochdale?
That sounds far too posh to be America.

...

A quick google has uncovered that this was actually in....England.
Disregard the above then, please. Those bloody Englishmen are always mucking things up, first our gulfs, and now my blog posts. I may have to rant on this.