In this post, we look at a minor subset of AIDS (Annoying Internet DenizenS), the caps lock rager.
Caps lock ragers are often characterized by LARGE, OBNOXIOUS, TEXT ALL IN CAPS (AND PROBABLY BOLDED, FOR GOOD MEASURE.), typos, and chains of 1's following exclamation marks, and left out apostrophes.
Sample: OMG I CANT BELIEV YOU BELIEEV THAT YOU IDIOT!!!!!!!11111
While not as major offenders as other groups of AIDS, they do exist. Thus, this post does as well. (And you didn't even have to open a box to see!) These AIDS are mostly overly hormonally charged teens with too much time on their hands, 8-year olds who don't understand that spawn camping is A-OK, or those who are backseat admins.
Hey, just a word to all of you...sound doesn't carry in text. No matter how loudly you bang your keyboard (NO NOT IN THAT WAY!), it won't make your text louder. (It only breaks your keyboard faster.) We don't think you're more outraged when the number of spelling mistakes increases. And strings of 1's are meaningless, unless you're cursing at us in binary.
So, these AIDS are pretty easy get rid of, or at least, combat. Apart from ignoring them - always a viable option - one can defeat them with logic.
Example:
Rager: OMG I ARE CAPS LOCK RAGING ABOUT SOME MINOR UNIMPORTANT ISSUE!!!1!11
You: Why is your text in all caps?
Rager: IT IS AL IN CAPS CUZ IT MAKES MY TEXT LOUDER!!!!!
You: Umm....no it doesn't.
Rager: YES IT DOES AND IT MAKES MY OPINION WORTH MORE!!!111 HA I AM RIGHT!111
You: It only shows that you are either tripping so hard you can no longer differentiate between sight and sound, or that you didn't understand the concept in the first place.
AIDS #2 Subset - Shift key rager
These AIDS are a mutation of the above, in that their pinkies are permanantly stuck on the shift keys, and thus have immense trouble typing periods, commas, question marks, a, q, and z. They manage somehow. I'd like to know how, in case I ever superglue my fingers to the shift keys by accident.
No comments:
Post a Comment